and....SCENE

As promised I mentioned that I would let you know about my first day seeing patients.  Well... the morning started off with a bang when I didn't wake up to my alarm...0836 I shot out of bed to make myself presentable for a possible patient at 0900!!!!  Thank the universe I live a whopping 5 blocks from work...and my first patient was scheduled at 1000.  Little did my first patient know that I was busily watching modules on patient charting in the new electronic medical record system up until the minute I entered the room!  I know my school friends are smiling right now saying...typical Haws, waiting until the last minute.  As SEF and I like to coin ourselves as pressure prompted versus procrastinators...not much has changed.

The day progressed with similar anxieties, my next patient had a plethora of problems and I won't violate HIPPA here but lets just say I was walking at a fast pace up and down the halls...back and forth from our lab asking what culture vial I collect for what and resorting to my wonderful Medical Assistant (also brand new to the clinic) who gave me that look of...wouldn't this have been nice if we had been given a little training?!  What should have been a solid 30 minute appointment turned into 90 minutes...but I believe (and hope) my patient left feeling like I had been somewhat thorough.

I saw a grand total of 4 patients today, but I have to keep in mind...it was four more than I had yesterday and I dream to look back to this first day (which in reality will be the first few months) and smile.  Holding up to a solid standard...I do believe that I DID NOT kill anyone today!  Hooray!  Just keepin' it real.

I managed to muster the energy to drag my fat ass to the gym to do yet another Zuzana workout at the gym after getting home...even though my new couch and a plethora of "On Demand" episodes were calling my name.

I'm entering Friday trying to constantly recall the message my best girlfriends constantly advise me: "be kind to yourself!"  There was a point this summer, honed up in the windowless office, sitting next to my chair of my committee...(who continues to get so caught up in the minutia, it's a effing wonder the crazy bitch gets herself dressed in the morning) hemming and hawing over a semi-colon in the final report of my capstone thinking..."I'll never get out of this academic hell..."  And here I am a short 3 months later finding myself feeling slightly elated and uneasy about the fact that I don't have hours of homework waiting for me when I return home.  I no longer have to mentally prepare myself to gear up for a weekend of 3, brutal 12 hour shifts in the ED after 5 solid days of class, clinical and papers just to make ends meet.  I am still in disbelief that I've finally reached this point.

I'm looking forward to a weekend with one of my favorite people on this earth...my sister-in-law (who is more a sister/best friend than anything) is coming down to visit Portland and me.  I'm hoping to have her help me unpack some more boxes and organize the house a bit more...I've found myself a bit stuck with the nesting portion of this move...I've lost my mojo and hoping Liz will help me get out of the vortex.  The other goal is to hopefully walk around Portland (unless it's unrelentingly raining) and find some new treasures I will tell you about.

Until next time, I'll leave you with a very wise mantra from Tony Horton himself - "Just do your best and forget the rest"....that's really all we can do isn't it?